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| Midniiight_ | Traduction anglais | 13 | 14/04/11 à 19:04 |
Bonsoir j'aurais voulu savoir si mon expression écrite était correcte, sachant que je dois utiliser du plus que Perfect et du preterit.
Lee Weiczynkowski a young student of the region of the midwest is a promising soccer player with a prestigious future. Called "obsessed with soccer" by her mom, she practiced her sport extensively, to become the best. However, last year she was rejected by others and she was cut from her team. But this girl had a lot of willpower ! and she has been selected for the Olympic developmental program's regional soccer team.
She has become a celebrity in her town, but her happiness has been short-lived, the very day she returns home from soccer camp, she learnt that her father has a serious illness. So she has worked ( là j'hésite entre preterit et plus que perfect) even more hard to surmount this event.
thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, her mothers has thought it was a good opportunity for her to change country. (pareil pour cette phrase)
her coach places many hopes in her, indeed she can become a professional !
Merci d'avance. 
| Traduction anglais | 1/13 | 14/04/2011 à 19:10 |
Tu dois utiliser du present perfect ou du past perfect (aussi appelé pluperfect) ? Parce que là tu emploies parfois l'un parfois l'autre, c'est pas clair. En plus dans la première phrase y'a un verbe au présent, donc si le texte est supposé être au passé c'est pas logique x)
| Traduction anglais | 2/13 | 14/04/2011 à 20:35 |
Oups désolé, je me suis trompé je voulais dire 'présent perfect'
| Traduction anglais | 3/13 | 14/04/2011 à 20:41 |
C'est vraiment obligé ? Parce que les constructions de phrases laissent une possibilité bien plus intéressante niveau grammatical.
"So she has worked ( là j'hésite entre preterit et plus que perfect) even more hard to surmount this event.
Thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, her mothers has thought it was a good opportunity for her to change country."
Which turns into :
So she started working even harder to overcome this event.
thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, her mother thinking it was a good opportunity for her to go in another country.
Essaie de reformuler tes phrases.
EDIT : Besides, "Called "obsessed with soccer" by her mom" n'est pas correct me semble-t-il. Essaie de trouver un autre verbe à moins de me prouver que cette construction existe bel et bien.
"So she has worked ( là j'hésite entre preterit et plus que perfect) even more hard to surmount this event.
Thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, her mothers has thought it was a good opportunity for her to change country."
Which turns into :
So she started working even harder to overcome this event.
thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, her mother thinking it was a good opportunity for her to go in another country.
Essaie de reformuler tes phrases.
EDIT : Besides, "Called "obsessed with soccer" by her mom" n'est pas correct me semble-t-il. Essaie de trouver un autre verbe à moins de me prouver que cette construction existe bel et bien.
| Traduction anglais | 4/13 | 14/04/2011 à 21:55 |
She has become a celebrity in her town, but her happiness has been short-lived, because the very day she returned home from soccer camp, she learnt that her father had a serious illness. So she has worked (honnêtement j'hésite un peu aussi 
l'alternative de Dargor est bien ) even harder to face this event.
Thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, because her mother thought it was a good opportunity for her to change country. (pareil pour cette phrase)
her coach places many hopes in her : maladroit, pas idiomatique, mais bon si l'exercice porte sur les temps c'est pas trop grave
indeed she can become a professional ! : je mettrais plutôt "may"
Voilà je pense que c'est un peu mieux
l'alternative de Dargor est bien ) even harder to face this event.Thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, because her mother thought it was a good opportunity for her to change country. (pareil pour cette phrase)
her coach places many hopes in her : maladroit, pas idiomatique, mais bon si l'exercice porte sur les temps c'est pas trop grave
indeed she can become a professional ! : je mettrais plutôt "may"
Voilà je pense que c'est un peu mieux
| Traduction anglais | 5/13 | 14/04/2011 à 22:21 |
Ca veut dire quoi "the very day" ??
Sinon, y'a quelques fautes, telle que : "She has become"---> "She became"
Sinon, y'a quelques fautes, telle que : "She has become"---> "She became"
| Traduction anglais | 6/13 | 14/04/2011 à 22:31 |
Lee Weiczynkowski a young student of the region of the midwest is a promising soccer player with a prestigious future. Called "obsessed with soccer" by her mom, she has practiced her sport extensively, to become the best. However, last year she was rejected by others and she was cut from her team. But this girl has got a lot of willpower ! and she has been selected for the Olympic developmental program's regional soccer team.
She has become a celebrity in her town, but her happiness has been short-lived, the very day she returned home from soccer camp, she learnt that her father had a serious illness. So she worked even harder to surmount this event.
thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, her mother thought it was a good opportunity for her to change country.
her coach has placed many hopes in her, indeed she can become a professional !
| Traduction anglais | 7/13 | 14/04/2011 à 22:32 |
jai oublier " she became a celebrity".
| Traduction anglais | 8/13 | 15/04/2011 à 19:47 |
Merci Beaucoup 
| Traduction anglais | 9/13 | 17/04/2011 à 21:33 |
A mon goût "of the region of the midwest" est un peu lourd. Il ne serait pas mieux de mettre "of a midwest region ou of the midwest region".
| Traduction anglais | 10/13 | 17/04/2011 à 21:36 |
exact
| Traduction anglais | 11/13 | 17/04/2011 à 21:42 |
Lee Weiczynkowski a young student from the region of the midwest is a promising soccer player with a prestigious future. Called "obsessed with soccer" by her mom, she practiced her sport extensively, to become the best. However, last year she was rejected by others and she has been cut from her team. But this girl had a lot of willpower ! and so, she has been selected for the Olympic developmental program's regional soccer team.
She became a celebrity in her town, but her happiness has been short-lived, the very day she came back home from soccer camp, she learnt that her father had a serious illness. So she has been working even harder to face this event.
thanks to her training she joined the team of Manchester, her mothers pas de has thought it was a good opportunity for her to change country.
her coach places many hopes in her, indeed she may become a professional !
Ca me parait pas mal
She became a celebrity in her town, but her happiness has been short-lived, the very day she came back home from soccer camp, she learnt that her father had a serious illness. So she has been working even harder to face this event.
thanks to her training she joined the team of Manchester, her mothers pas de has thought it was a good opportunity for her to change country.
her coach places many hopes in her, indeed she may become a professional !
Ca me parait pas mal
| Traduction anglais | 12/13 | 17/04/2011 à 21:46 |
vodkaaa 0_0 a écrit :
Ca veut dire quoi "the very day" ??
The very day = le jour même, au sens de "Pile le jour où/le jour même où elle est rentrée chez elle, elle a appris que son père était malade"
Ca veut dire quoi "the very day" ??
The very day = le jour même, au sens de "Pile le jour où/le jour même où elle est rentrée chez elle, elle a appris que son père était malade"
| Traduction anglais | 13/13 | 17/04/2011 à 21:51 |
Lee Weiczynkowski a young student of a midwest region is a promising soccer player (with a prestigious future ou career). Called "obsessed (by ou fanatic of football) soccer" by her mom, she has practiced her sport (extensively intensely) , to become the best. However, last year she was rejected by others and she was (cut excluded) from her team. But this girl has got a lot of willpower ! and she has been selected for the Olympic developmental program's regional soccer team.
She (has become became) a celebrity in her town, but her happiness has been short-lived, the very day she returned home from soccer camp, she learnt that her father had a serious illness. So she worked even harder to surmount this event.
thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, her mother thought it was a good opportunity (for her) to change country.
her coach has placed many hopes in her, indeed she can become professional !
She (has become became) a celebrity in her town, but her happiness has been short-lived, the very day she returned home from soccer camp, she learnt that her father had a serious illness. So she worked even harder to surmount this event.
thanks to her trainings she has been integrated in the team of Manchester, her mother thought it was a good opportunity (for her) to change country.
her coach has placed many hopes in her, indeed she can become professional !